Wednesday, April 25, 2012
another chance to see each other
sobrang badtrip ng connection, wala kaming matinong pag-uusap... haaayyy... :(
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Bug off NOEL!!
Why is it so hard for some people to let go of their past and move on?
MR.NOEL BALINANG, for 3 years I have stood up on my own feet and established my own happiness with you having NOTHING to do with it. For some time you've been flooding me with your pathetic text messages and now you're acting like a desperate STALKER as if you would get anything out of doing such. You have never changed a bit and the more I pity you.
One piece of unsolicited advice Noel.. I heard you're about to get married soon to some unfortunate woman who deserves my pity as well. So why dont you just focus on her and leave me alone. Its high time you grow up, and MOVE ON!
Thursday, April 19, 2012
I'd rather be a GAY than be a STRAIGHT GUY
Oftentimes I feel so grateful that God created me this way.
I want to shout to the world how proud I am for being GAY.
Proudest because I have Rhon who loves me so dearly and unconditionally.
Im proud coz i turned out this way and not some straight guy who collects women and dumps them easily.
Not part of a marriage which will soon end up because of indecisiveness, selfishness and lack of readiness.
Not part of a long term relationship which you can no longer get out of even if you want to coz you dont have any other choice but to stay.
Not a straight guy who's on a desperate attempt to be with someone whom he will just consider a toddler,a pet or a mascot,and not a partner.
Not a straight guy who will raise his children with crooked upbringing.
And not a straight guy who has his balls bigger than his brain.
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Friday, April 13, 2012
Leaving for a While...
Kahapon pa may topak yung smart roaming ni Rhon. I can receive text messages from him but he can't receive my text messages. I can't even call him coz his voice roaming service isn't activated yet. Hay, and they're all conspiring on us. He's on his way to Rabigh now, 26 hours land trip from Jubail. I constantly reminded him since yesterday na magbaon na lang ng food nya on his way there, since puro Indian foods ang pilit niyang kinakain. Kawawa naman ang asawa ko, ang dami niyang kailangang tiisin habang nandun sya, and as much as possible I'm trying to give him all the encouragement I could give to keep him going and to ease out his loneliness there.
Tonight I will be going home in Santiago where my parents are at. I guess I just wanted to have some time off. Time to relax my mind a bit from missing Rhon, but it will not stop there I know. Change of environment perhaps coz I never stopped thinking of him not a single day dito sa bahay. Sobrang dami ng memories eh, at ayokong mag-sabayan kami ng lungkot. I will probably never get tired of thinking about him, and everyday of my life without him, lage ko sya maaalala. For the meantime I'll take care of my parents first and our sanctuary there. But I'll be back in a jiffy, I'll definitely be back on track with Rhon always on my thoughts.
Tonight I will be going home in Santiago where my parents are at. I guess I just wanted to have some time off. Time to relax my mind a bit from missing Rhon, but it will not stop there I know. Change of environment perhaps coz I never stopped thinking of him not a single day dito sa bahay. Sobrang dami ng memories eh, at ayokong mag-sabayan kami ng lungkot. I will probably never get tired of thinking about him, and everyday of my life without him, lage ko sya maaalala. For the meantime I'll take care of my parents first and our sanctuary there. But I'll be back in a jiffy, I'll definitely be back on track with Rhon always on my thoughts.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Jessica Sanchez gets "The Save" from the Judges
J Lo's reaction when Jessica was voted out
watch full video here: http://myamericanidoltv.com/news/american-idol-top-7-results-4-12-2012-jessica-sanchez-stays-judges-activate-save/
The Result of Tears
rhon got a chance to be online this evening (around 4PM there), I was happy coz i was able to see him again... but look at his swollen eyes...
and the longing, drama, and tears continued..
Tearful Day
While doing the laundry late this afternoon, Patrick handed me my
phone coz an unknown number was calling me, it was Rhon, and he was sobbing. I
asked him why he was crying again. He said, “Miss na miss na kita ‘ga, may
nakita akong picture mo sa cp ko dito..sobrang miss na kita.” And he unrelentingly
cried. I also cried furtively coz I felt the same way for him. This day was
such a heavy one for both of us. As if we will no longer see each other. Ang
hirap ng ganito…
Syping Full of Tears
Today was just an ordinary day, though an anticipated video chat with Rhon would take place any time, and it did. He told me that I will receive a text message from him signalling me that he's already online. For the past days since he left I made it sure to be constantly logged in to YM and skype, but today I wasnt able to ready myself because our pc was being used by our youngest brother Patrick in finishing his project. I got up so fast as soon as i got his message, and there he was..i was happy upon seeing him again. We started chatting but then he started to cry coz he was missing me badly. I couldnt take it any longer, and then i let it all out. Wala na 'ko pakialam kahit para akong tangang pinapanood ni Patrick na umiiyak. It was a very emotional moment for us as if it was the end of the world. Sumambulat lahat ng emosyon na pakiramdam ko'y matagal nang nakimkim. It was our moment, again. For how long are we going to stay this way, hindi ko alam. All I know is that we're two souls drawn apart for the very first time, blurting our longing for each other. Matagal-tagal pa, but I know for sure this'll all pass, but our love for each other will forever linger. I miss him so much... :(
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Skyping with Rhon 2
so happy coz we had another video chat moment...medyo malabo nga lang but we enjoyed our 2 hrs video chat..
What LOVE is...
It’s not age, sexuality, wealth, religion or culture that
determines the success of your relationship. It is your willingness to discover
what love means.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
Missing You Rhon...
The
reason why it hurts so much to be apart from you
is
that our hearts and souls are connected.
I
miss you so much Rhon.
I
love you.
Respect
Missing Rhon made me
recall certain queries I have in mind. He's in a country right now wherein
people cling on to their culture firmly, wherein almost 75% of them are under
the same religion, and its uncalled-for that Rhon has to embrace such culture
and religion. He bought a book about the place, the do's and dont's of
everything there, and I was quite taken aback to learn how stipulated these
things are to be succumbed. Yes, respect
is the bottom line here, and Filipinos are well-known when it comes to
respect and conformity. Why would it be so compulsory for us Pinoys to envelop
ourselves with the culture and belief of the country we will be working at? Yes
we can give it all the respect it deserves, but is there any reciprocation?
Foreign people from different countries come and work here in the Philippines
but we're not that conscientious with them. I guess I just somehow wanted to
see mutual changes between countries, considering the fact that we all acquire
from each other. Rhon even said that most of the food there are Indian foods
and he's really not used to how they cook food, and how the food tastes. Why?
Aren't there any other nationalities living and working in that place aside
from Indians. These people should somehow learn to balance things in every
circumstance.
First Video Chat
Had our first video chat about 3 hours ago. It felt so different to have this set-up and doing it for the very first time. I miss Rhon so bad that I wanted to really make the most of that time, kaso andito si Baby Shawn, so untimely when we really wanted to spend some quality time together. Her mom left him for 3 hours and damn he never stopped crying. I felt like it was so unfair for me and Rhon but what can I do...for the longest time Rhon just stared at his cam but not being able to see me on the other line. We still had a good chat though. He cried a few tears upon seeing me, while I forbade myself in doing the same thing, kasi mas malulungkot lang siya. We'll still catch up tomorrow, and I cant contain my excitement and longing for that moment. God I miss him so much...
American Idol 2012 Spoilers: The Top 7 Theme and Mentor Revealed!
It’s about to get contemporary up in here! American Idol
Season 11’s Top 7 are going to sing songs that they’re actually old enough to
remember this week.
Idol producer Nigel Lythgoe let it slip on his Twitter
account the theme for Wednesday’s performances is “This Decade,” meaning the
remaining contestants will be able to choose from songs released in 2010, 2011,
and 2012. It’s a short period of time, but there’s tons of amazing material in
there.
Nigel later added that they’ll work with R&B artist Akon,
who performed on the show in 2007.
Monday, April 9, 2012
On his second day, I got another phone
call from Rhon.
Things turned out to be not quite what
he expected.
I don’t want to go into details but I
know he's strong enough to get through it, Rhon's a survivor.
I just told him not to be easily
discouraged because it’s just his second day there.
Definitely things will get better in the
days to come.
So stay strong Rhon, I know you can do
it.
I love you.
Photos Disrespecting the Lenten Cross
Just
a day after the nation observed Lent, life - and cyberspace - returned from a
brief hiatus but in a rather unpleasant way.
Many
netizens are crying foul over a girl's apparent disrespect for religious
symbols as she posed for a photo looking like she was nailed to a cross.
The
photo was taken by a certain Maike Domingo in Bgy. Lourdes in Angeles,
Pampanga. His Facebook album would also reveal that others had posed for the
same photo too, including a foriegn woman and two men who appeared to be
Filipinos.
Another
photo showed children climbing up the cross, as if let loose in a playground.
GMA
News Online has tried but failed to get in touch with Domingo on the matter.
'Forgive
them for they know not what they do'
The
photo, which as of posting time had over 5,000 shares on Facebook, has sparked
online rage. The older population of the Pinoy cyberspace tried to put it in
context with youth and its subscription to modernism.
But
some have opted to contain their ire and pray instead for the individuals,
quoting Luke 23:34: "Father forgive them for they know not what they
do."
GMA
News Online has stumbled upon another photo which appeared to have been taken
in the same place in Angeles, Pampanga. The photo, taken by photographer Jay
Javier, is a jumpshot of two girls in front of the cross.
Javier,
on his Facebook page, said the photo was taken on Good Friday and commented,
"Even non-believers will cringe at the sight of this blatant show of
disrespect and impropriety."
'Officials
didn't do anything about it'
Javier
also told GMA News Online that he approached the event officials/organizers to
"do something about it, but they just appeared to have tolerated it."
"They
made a feeble attempt to stop these follies, but the person tasked to that left
immediately after," Javier said. "The 'set' with the crosses were
left unattended, for anyone to play in, and do poses like [these] photos."
Caritas
Manila executive director Fr. Anton Pascual said over Catholic station Radyo
Veritas that today's youth seemed to have lost respect for spiritual things
along with their moral values, and need to be educated about it.
"Kaya’t ipagdasal natin ang ating mga kabataan ngayon
at mabigyan ng tamang pag-aaral ng paggalang sa mga bagay na esperitwal tulad
ng crucifix at malaman din ng mga
kabataan na ito ang identity at moral
values at paggalang sa relihiyon," Pascual said.
Pascual
also reminded that social media, despite its power to connect people, can be
used for wrong.
"Pero
ito (social media) ay binibigyan natin ng
babala ng ating Simbahan na bagamat ito
ay nakatutulong itoy maaari ding maging instrumento upang magdulot ng isang
masamang katuruan at lalason sa mga kaiasiapn ng mga kabataan tulad ng paglabag
sa Gospel values at sa tinatawag natin na good manners and right conduct,"
he added.
— RSJ/KBK, GMA News
Men 101: Hot Men in the Philippines_Century Boys
Sunday, April 8, 2012
15 Signs Your Relationship is Meant To Be
Even when you're crazy about someone, it can often be
hard to know if he or she is "right" for you. How do you know you
won't feel differently in a year? Ten years? A lifetime? Deciding if you can
commit to someone is a deeply personal determination, and everyone has
different criteria. As in any verdict, you have to start by assessing the
evidence. With that in mind, YourTango has come up with 15 signs that you're
dating a soul mate. You don't have to check off all of these points to be sure
about someone-but if you can say yes to several, you've found someone very
special.
1. You tell him things you don't tell anyone else. We
don't mean blurting something out after you've had too much merlot, but the
desire to tell him intimate details about your life means you trust him-a major
component of successful long-term love. Related: 10 Signs Your Guy Is
Definitely In Love With You
2. You let her see you in moments of weakness. It's easy
to be happy with someone when you're feeling good about life. But what about
when you're not doing so well? Do you want to see her when you've been denied a
raise, or your cat died or you had a plain old bad day? She should be a comfort
during tough times, not a burden.
3. You respect him. You don't want to change the essence
of who he is. There may be stuff that irritates you in everyday life-he insists
on wearing his favorites, holey T-shirt, he eats sugar cereal for dinner, he
still watches Saturday morning cartoons-but you like him, plain and simple.
Related: 6 Ways To Be Extra-Supportive
4. You want him to meet your parents. You feel proud of
him and you want to show him off-as opposed to feeling like you have to make
excuses for him.
5. You can imagine a future together. You don't have to
practice writing your first name with his last name, but do you periodically
let your mind wander to picture a life together? Is it amazing?
6. You're not afraid to disagree with him. You know that
even if you fight, he'll listen to you and won't brush you off. He takes you
seriously, even when he thinks you're wrong. Related: 9 Things To Say During A
Fight
7. You want to work out your major differences. If you
do have crucial differences that will impact your future together-different
opinions about religion, money or something else-you want to work them out with
him, and you believe you can come to a conclusion that will satisfy both of
you.
8. You laugh together. Laughter is one of life's
simplest pleasures-you should definitely be able to crack each other up.
9. You're incredibly, utterly, surprisingly attracted to
her. Physical chemistry is an undeniably important ingredient in a healthy
relationship. And if she's not a classic beauty or your usual "type"?
Even more reason to think she's the one.
10. It's OK to be quiet around her. You don't feel like
you have to fill the space between you with chatter or other interaction.
Instead, you feel an easy comfort.
11. You feel like yourself around him. You don't feel
like you have to edit your thoughts; you're not self-conscious or anxious.
12. You need him the right amount. You long for him-but
not too much. Some neediness is good but too much breeds discontent.
13. You don't feel too jealous. You're comfortable with
him going out with his friends-even female friends. You let each other have
your own lives and hobbies. Related: Feeling Jealous? Could Be A Good Thing
14. You feel like she makes you a better person. She
makes you feel smart, funny, attractive, creative-like the best version of
yourself. You feel like she brings out and complements the best parts of you.
15. She just gets you. Sometimes it's that easy. You
feel like she understands some essential part of you that you can't explain or
articulate. It's a warm, comfortable feeling-and one you should have with the
person you marry.
My Prayer
Father.. You hear our
hearts. We do not want to settle, we do not want to find comfortable
positions and put up our tents there and be happy with you blessing me. Father we
understand that forgiveness and reconciliation and blessing and favor are given
for a reason. It is given for a purpose Father. And today we say God,
"Forgive us!" Forgive us when we have taken this attitude. Father,
use us! Pick us! Choose us! We want to spend ourselves. FATHER I WANT TO GET TO
HEAVEN WITH A LIFE POURED OUT! Not with a life that looks perfect God. I DO NOT
WANT TO LOOK GOOD. I WANT TO BE GOOD! We love you today Father God! Let our
love be seen on this Earth. Let our love be carved out on the pavements of our neighbourhoods.
Let our love be carved out for the lonely, for the state that we were in. We
were in that state God, yet someone bothered to take the time and present you
to us. We'll never ever take that for granted and in turn we'll live our lives
as a thank you! AMEN
Saturday, April 7, 2012
This is it...
This is it. I woke up with tears in my eyes coz I know this is the very day. "Ayoko na ng iyakan please", Rhon told me. This day felt like the longest day we have. Rhon took care of everything this day. From cooking, doing the dishes and all. We bought our favorite pudding bread from a nearby local bakery. We laid down together and had our moment that afternoon. It was the saddest day for us but we make sure we do something intimate before we part ways. A lot of bad signs still continue to show up that day. My brother was supposed to bring us to the airport but the car had tire problems on their way home from Zambales. We just hailed a cab to the airport and Daisy was already there to pay for the taxi fare coz we dont have any cash at that time. We never had much time to bid each other goodbye, so I gave the siblings their moment. When I saw Daisy crying while embracing Rhon, I wanted to cry as well, but I contained myself. Daisy left early coz Dale is not feeling well. I was left there. Rhon was already in the line going to the check in area, and as I see him getting nearer and nearer to that spot, its as if my heart was being ripped off. He was already inside and I can only see him through the tinted glass outside. He looked back at me, waved goodbye, and thats it. Thats the last time i saw him. Its as if the whole world was mine that time, i cried a lot and i didnt care if there are a lot of people around me. It was the most painful event for me. "Ngayon ko naramdaman yung iniwan ng mahal mo sa buhay para magtrabaho abroad." Ganun pala yun. I waited for an hour more. I just wanted to make sure that Rhon is settled inside before I leave. We were just texting that time. I went home coz he asked me to. At the bus, I still cried a lot. And as soon as I reached home, i cried even more. I looked at every walls and corners of our house, and in every spot I see Rhon there. Now Im alone again. Nakakapanibago. Para akong gago na iyak ng iyak nang patago. Dun lang nag- sync in sa akin na mag-isa na pala ako. Yung mga cheap trips namin, dine out sa Mcdo, Takoyaki, sizzling grill sa Farmers Plaza. Dvd marathon, pudding, maruya. Malayo na yung laundry buddy ko. Kaharutan at kakulitan ko araw-araw. Wala na magpepedicure sa akin. Yung kasama kong pupunta sa salon. Wala nako kasama mamalengke, magsimba sa Quiapo, at magvideoke.
You will be missed Rhon. 18 months is just a jiffy. But upon waking up this morning without you by my side, the very first day without you, it felt like eternity. I love you.
Last night, we cried our hearts out, it was the most tearful moment Rhon and I had. He posted two videos on Facebook, two of which he was trying to finish for a month now. He was in the shower when I sneaked into them, that's when I bursted into tears. At first he was hesitant to cry but he wasnt able to contain it any longer, then we cried. We embraced as if its the end of the world, and we cried as if that was the last night for both of us. At long last we had the chance to let it out, because we've been struggling keeping our emotions for how many months now. It still is sad til now. L
Friday, April 6, 2012
DeAndre Brackensick
Reasons
one of my favorites for this season of American Idol..it should've not been him yet...
Have a Blessed Black Saturday
This is the most blessed Sabbath on which Christ sleeps, but
on the third day he shall rise again. Therefore, O Lord our God, we sing to you
a hymn, a song to your burial: By your burial you have opened for us the gates
of life, and by your death you have slain death and hell. O God, our deliverer,
blessed are You!
Good Friday 2012
Shrine of Jesus
Went to Seaside while waiting for the Daan ng Kruz
The Eye at MOA
grabbed refreshments at Quickly coz the scourging heat is killing us
Half Mass
the crowd waiting for the Daan ng Kruz
Good Friday Procession
plain candle cannot withstand the wind coming from the bay that's why we have these torches
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